It's all okay...

Dear new parent,

Congratulations on the birth of your beautiful baby! She's so perfect and tiny. 10 fingers and 10 toes and the cutest button nose you have ever seen. But there's more. You have just become a parent to an earth angel and she has Down syndrome. Two words you never thought you'd hear.

It's ok...that suddenly you feel like your dreams are shattered and your heart breaks. You're angry. You're scared. You're grieving. It feels like the end of your world as you know it. I get it. I felt all of the same emotions...I just got to feel them a little earlier. I am not sure which is easier, and it doesn't really matter. We all have our story. And we all process and cope in different ways. I am not going to tell you what to feel and I'm not going to tell you what not to feel. But I will tell you, it's ok to feel what you need to feel. And I will gently remind you that there is still so much to celebrate! You have created a beautiful baby. A precious little being. A valuable life. He may not be what you were expecting, but he is still very much your child and still needs you...to cuddle him and to nurture him. He needs you to accept him and to love him. 

It's ok...if she feels a little "softer" in your arms. Hold her close. Look at that sweet face<3 So beautiful! She looks like you...like your older daughter...or like her daddy.  She has the most AMAZING eyes that will disappear when she smiles. They will stop you in your tracks and warm your heart. And when she looks at you, she will see into your soul. She will see you for you, and will unconditionally accept you for all that you are and all that you feel you are not. 

It's ok...that you may be scared. You know nothing about raising a baby with special needs. You may have preconceived ideas about Down syndrome from when you were a child. Your doctors may have told you of the things that your baby can't or won't do. None of that matters now. YOU write your own story. NO ONE can tell you what your child will or will not do. There are no guarantees with any child. Your child with or without Down syndrome may or may not do things that you dream for them. It's ok...NO ONE knows. But s/he will LOVE you...that IS a guarantee!

It's ok that s/he will have to work a little harder and may take a little longer to reach those "milestones".  And it's ok to get discouraged sometimes. It takes time. But s/he will get there, with your help and when they do...you will scream with excitement. NO ONE can tell you what you child can or can not do. YOU are his teacher. His guardian. His biggest advocate. You are his mother. And he is your whole world! And that's better than ok. It's down right awesome! 

Welcome to the club, Mama<3  It's all going to be ok!

Love,

A very lucky mom to a very special little boy